When we went bowling last week I decided to top off our event with a very cheap meal. Queue our Tesco Clubcard vouchers. As you know over the years we've done much with these, but the value has dipped and now they just pile up.
As bowling was at the Marina I transferred £30 of vouchers to Prezzo vouchers. Something I haven't done since son was tiny. When he was tiny we used these a lot. It got us out of the house when we didn't get out much because we had nobody to support us with childcare. It meant that on a Sunday lunchtime we could go out for some sort of meal and if son started crying or playing up we could just walk out and it wasn't a waste of money.
Anyway, my £30 of Tesco vouchers equated to £99 of Prezzo vouchers. So at least we could have quite a feast. Imagine our surprise when on arrival after the bowling we discovered they were fully booked!!!! I mean who... no I'll not go there.
So on Friday I booked a table at Prezzo and we went there and spent all our vouchers. Obviously with their prices that meant we could have quite a lot and actually it was good fun just going for it. I'm not going to lie I absolutely hated my pasta, but husband and son enjoyed their pizza so I kept my mouth shut.
I should also mention that apart from the 3 of us there was barely anybody in there - which is what I'd expected the first time.
Today I'm feeling a little sad and trying to keep myself together. Dad has a huge growth on his head. I'm not clear if it's cancer or not, but it certainly looks like it. He's been waiting for a year for it to be removed (which is appauling). It gets removed on 6th October and he'll need a general anasthetic. I'm not clear if it's on the surface or deeper. Either way I can't let myself believe he'll come out of the general anasthetic. I just can't see it.
So today Mum and Dad are coming for lunch. I strongly suspect this is actually me saying goodbye to my father. I'm internalising because the last thing I want to do is to upset everybody and ruin the day crying and going over the top (it's terribly un-British for starters). So I'm cooking all his favourite things in a last meal kinda way and even managed to find a very early Christmas Cake in the shops. That's his favourite thing. I'll send him home with that.
So for lunch we're having pasta with crab, prawn and chilli, followed by the Dorset Apple cake he loves - with good old Ambrosia custard. All this with two different types of garlic bread and with some salads. I know that nobody will know that's my love language and it's going to be tough. I suspect I'll lock myself away and cry once we've happily waved goodbye.
It's tough isn't it. But actually I'm hugely grateful that I'm having the opportunity to say goodbye in this quiet way. Much better than finishing on a row and regretting it forever. I really feel for the people that happens too. Whilst in reality all the happy memories will more likely be there, it must be difficult to rationalise.
Oh crap - I just cried whilst I wrote that. Got to go and touch up my make-up. Put my big girl pants on, fix that stiff upper lift, stick my chin in the air and make this a great day.
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