I was so irritated this morning I didn't even give her a proper shower down, I used a cleaning cloth and just sponge bathed her. I've washed her so much this week that whenever I say 'come here' she cowers away from me in fear. Clearly happier with the rich natural smell of anothers poo than the dog shampoo she keeps getting washed down with.
I know the obvious is to take her to a different location for the walk. I've tried that, this week she is capable of finding poo in any location. Tomorrow I'll take her to beach and doubtless she'll find a dead fish!!!
Just had a message from my friend in Ireland. The one that used to come over every Saturday for supper, turns out her son has literally just turned full teenager. Her son has always been so bright and bubbly and because he spends so much time around adults into things like playing the trumpet in marching bands and working at the local steam railway with the volunteers. She's completely unprepared for him going full stroppy teenager. I'd like to pretend I'm not laughing, but I openly am.
On which note, at long last I have clarity on why I'm perhaps not the best friend in the world. After a 2.5 year struggle to get the analysis yesterday I was formally diagnosed as autistic. There are three levels, with 3 requiring high level care. I'm not surprised to find I am at level 1. However, it's a huge relief to me as it answers a lot of questions. I just wish I could go back to all the people I've pissed off over the years without understanding why and let them know.
However, there's no looking back on this one, those days are over. Now I have the diagnosis I can hopefully do some decent research into it and come up with better strategies for the future.
I have to say thank you to the new enlightened generation. 'In my day' even dyslexia was barely diagnosed. It's only been the past few years as people have talked more openly about 'Spectrum' I thought 'oh hang on, that sounds like me'.
It's not like I'm going to go into work tomorrow and demand my rights or anything, this is a private journey for me to go on alone. But it does mean I can stop beating myself up for being 'weird', 'different', 'not quite normal'. Which are things I've had thrown at me for years.
That said, I like who I am, so I'm not going to change. It just means I can stop wondering why I inexplicably upset other people all the time and never quite understand what I did.
Hmmm, I suspect that means there will be some change over time. I mean I'd rather not piss people off, but I'm not going to dilute the core of me. Watch this space, I'll share revellations with you. If there are any, I don't tend to be strong on the revalation front! Tra, la, la - Unicorn, Squirrel.
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