So it's half term so my son is home again and husband has taken the week off. It feels like only 5 minutes since the kids went back to school.
On Monday we went to Bramber Castle again with one of son's friends. Was actually a beautiful day with the sun shining. One of those lovely October days you can get.
If you're not a Sussex lass like me I'll explain that Bramber Castle is really just a few walls and a moat you can walk around. But it's in a lovely village. Unlike the last time we went which was a couple of days after lockdown - we were the only people there.
The rest of the week has been focused on working towards my new business. I've been trying to work on a short marketing video. It's been creating huge amounts of stress. One of my friends is currently on a marketing course and has been using my video as their case study. So every time I've done a new draft I've had a classroom of people I don't know and who don't know my business plan picking it apart.
Why is it that when you get 100 bits of good feedback and one bit of bad feedback you just can't stop yourself only listening to the one bit of bad feedback? I know that it's not unusual and there are 100 articles out there saying 'ignore the bad feedback, focus on the positive'. It's actually much easier to tell other people to do that than to do it yourself.
So today I'm going to do my final (third version of final) draft of the video and then I'm not going to share it with anybody. SO THERE. Although that's not entirely true as it's actually a marketing video and thus I'll be sharing it with as many people as possible. Arggghhh - do you see why this is getting me so frustrated?
Once I've done that I'm going back to my website. That was one of the first things I did - I built it and then walked away so I could have it running around in the back of my mind. I'm so glad I took that approach as what I now deliver is going to be entirely different from that first draft. What's actually great about that fact is it means that I'm getting much more clear about the direction of the business, its message and its branding.
On top of all of this I've had a real crisis of confidence this week. I think probably because of all the negative feedback on the marketing. Next month I'm going to start talking things through with my network - I think that this will go either way. I will either have a massive boost to my confidence and start looking at the world through rose tinted glasses - or...........
Time will tell.
I think one of the biggest problems at the moment is also that no matter what I'm doing there are a million other things I should be doing. So whilst I'm crossing one thing off my to do list, I'm literally thinking about the other things I'm not getting to. This is both home and work related.
On top of that my mobile phone is going through one of its difficult phases. Every month and a half for 3 days it just stops working. It freezes on me, it's usually because there's an update going on in the background - but not having a working phone is a massive nightmare. As an example it took me 20 minutes to download the photo used for this blog. In that 20 minutes I had to restart my phone 3 times.
I'm desperate to get a new phone - but as I haven't had a proper salary for 8 months now my savings are at zero. I get paid tomorrow - which is lucky as I currently have £12.45 in my bank account. This is going to be my first proper salary since March. Although I'm going to save as much as possible because who knows what's around the corner - I'm definitely going to invest in a new phone. I'm actually very excited.
A good friend has kindly said they'll give their old phone to my son. I said to son 'when you get that I can have your phone'. He looked at me as if I was a space alien and said 'it's mine'. I explained that when we moved the SIM over his phone would essentially just be useless. Having heard this rational explanation he just replied very firmly 'but it's mine'.
I'm hoping that this isn't a sign of bad parenting - or that son is going to grow up to be one of those people that live in a 3 foot space in their house because of all the stuff they've accumulated. Although I have to admit I'm living in hope for that day when son looks at his bedroom and decides he wants to upgrade to something more grown up. Right now he's got 12 years of accumulated junk piled up everywhere, I'm hoping this isn't a sign for the future.
Anyway, my to do list is calling - speak soon.
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