I'm so shattered at the moment, a friend came over and suggested HRT. I'm going to hold out for as long as I can. For some reason I'm just not comfortable with it. That said with the amount of stuff I've had injected into me over the last year (COVID related - not anything dodgy) I'm not sure why I'm worrying.
Work isn't amazing at the moment - to put it mildly. I'm in one of those situations where I've picked up a project that's nothing to do with my day job because if I don't do it nobody else can. The problem is that I love my day job and this project is beyond boring. It's the first time I've struggled to remain motivated since I started working from home. It's a real challenge and a case of dig your heels in and put your head down.
It's really frustrating though because 2 weeks ago my team became complete. This meant I'd literally got to the point where I could get my team into the place I need it to be. This is important if we're to be successful. Up until this point I've been covering the job roles I was trying to fill. Now as I work on this other - VERY BORING - project all I'm thinking is 'I should be doing.......'.
A few weeks ago on the 'Next Door' app there was a message from somebody saying they'd just moved to the country from India and they were interested to know if anybody would buy their cooking from their kitchen. I thought 'why not' so got in touch and put an order in.
The curry was literally the best one we'd ever had - but it wasn't cheap. Not massively expensive, but about £10 more overall than if we'd got a local Indian restaurant to deliver. It wasn't perfect though - first of all there wasn't delivery (which is fair enough), so I drove over to their house on Friday after work. I promptly got stuck in a horrific rush hour traffic jam - which didn't leave me in a great mood.
By the time I got home (about a 5 minute drive), the food was barely warm. This meant I had to spend 20 minutes in the kitchen warming everything up before we could eat it. This put me in a foul mood, the whole point of ordering out is so you don't have to spend time in the kitchen - or is that just me???
Anyway, as I say the food was amazing, not too spicy, but left you with a warm glow inside. The next day I got a WhatsApp asking for feedback. Needless to say I fed back that the food was amazing, but it was cold and so I'd had to spend time in the kitchen. The response back blamed the British weather being so cold and then went on to say that they didn't think that 20 minutes in the kitchen was too much to ask. However, next time I ordered they'd keep a note of my name and make sure that I got a curry that was piping hot.
I really hate it when people ask for feedback and then if it's not 100% positive come back and make you feel like it's your issue, not something that they can learn from. If you don't want constructive feedback - don't ask for it. Otherwise you're just fishing for compliments and that's basically irritating. It may just be my lack of social skills, but I'm so p'd off it will be a while before I order again. Maybe.... (it really was a very nice curry).
The lady is certainly good with social media as a friend came over on Saturday night and I mentioned the curry. She knew exactly who I was talking about as she'd seen the advertisements on social media. And she lives in Worthing which is miles away from where I live and where the lady is. Anyway - she'd better start accepting feedback or word will get around just as quickly that it's not as perfect as it might be.
On Sunday some friends came over - I hadn't seen them since before COVID. Really lovely to see them. Though I'm finding it more and more depressing meeting my friends as every single one of them is more successful than me. Do you know that nearly every one of my friends was so successful at work that they managed to retire when they were about 50. I feel like I've done something wrong with my life - I recon I'm going to be working until I drop - which to be fair may be in my mid-50's if I carry on being as exhausted as I am.
It's going to be interesting to see if my generation start dropping dead long before my parents generation. My parents generation seem to be ticking along forever - everybody is 80-100 and still going strong. Whilst people I know are dropping dead like flies whilst their parents still live on. Personally I'm convinced it's because of the work pressure my generation have had to put up with. Although it may simply be a coincidence and may be when my parents were my age they had a run of friends that popped their clogs.
Aaaanyway, all of my friends who are older than me and have retired - look about 10 years younger than I do and so relaxed. I'm happy for them, but also seething with jealousy. I think one of the reasons I'm so knackered is that for 13 years since my son was born I've been working a 4 day week. Now I'm working 5 days and the job I'm doing is a worthy one - and worthy jobs don't pay like the soul destroying ones. As a result I simply can't afford to drop down to 4 days until my son leaves school - which is 5 years away.
Perhaps I need to come up with some sort of get rich quick scheme. What a ridiculous thing to say - obviously we'd all love to come up with a get rich quick scheme - but if we had it in us we'd have done it years and years ago!!!!!
One of my friends that I really admire has her own business. We've been friends since school and she was one of those people that was amazing at everything at school (except perhaps sport), got the guys and still managed to be an utterly lovely human being. She's now my sons godmother - I love her to bits. Anyway,..............
She took her boys on a safari when they were about 4 and 6, it was a real challenge because nothing had been setup to make it easy for parents with kids. They had an amazing holiday and when they came back were telling friends about it. One friend asked her to help them book a similar holiday for them to go on with their kids - which she did quite happily (because she's lovely). Then one day her phone rang and it was one of the hotels she'd booked asking her where they should send the commission for her booking.
Now if it was me I'd have laughed and said 'Oh no, I'm not a holiday company I was just helping a friend out', but she didn't - she gave her bank account details and it sparked an idea. Many years later she now has a thriving business that focusses on high end holidays for people with kids.
She was always going to be a success. But the fact that I've admitted I would have turned down the commission probably goes to show why I'm still skint (and also why I was so useless when I had a sales job).
That's my post for this week, need to stop now, dig my heels in and get on with this darned boring project.
Sad times!
Oh, just thought of something exciting - it's 47 days until Christmas. I've finished my Christmas shopping and all but 4 presents are wrapped. Last night I wrote my Christmas cards. It's not all over excitement - my life is always so busy I never know when I'm going to be able to fit everything in. If I do it early it means I don't have to worry about it any more.
But a little bit of it is because I love Christmas. I REALLY love Christmas.
Took the dog for a walk last night and one person already had one strand of Christmas lights up - though may have been for Diwali.
It feels bonkers to think that this time last year I was feeling so low that I put my Christmas lights up for Diwali - all 3,000 of them. I forget when my inside decorations went up but it was definitely before Christmas. This year we are keeping decorations to one tree - my son's tree. That's because I don't want him to miss out. I'm confident that if my full range of decorations go up the dog will destroy them. Though I am wavering on my tree - it's so pretty. Maybe I'll just put that up, but leave all the other decorations.
Watch this space.
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