I am writing blog a day early today. Normally I start early on a Monday and bash out the blog before work starts.
However, tomorrow son has yet another sleepover - a sad one actually - his very best friend is leaving his school to go to another one. Whilst there are big plans to stay in touch it never really works out does it.
I'm particularly fond of this friend and so I am very sad, I love his parents as well, which is always a bonus. It's a shame that they live 40 minutes from each other because it's not like they can catch up easily at weekends. Anyway time will tell and let's face it our lives are full of people that we've loved dearly and then life plans have either moved them or you elsewhere.
The rich tapestry of our memories.
AAAANYWAY - somehow I've got to pick up another of his friends and then get him and his friend to the other friend's house for the goodbye celebration. All in my lunch hour. I can't see it happening so I've decided to start work an hour early in the morning so that I can have a bit of leeway and not have to get totally stressed out by the whole thing.
Life was easier when son was at his first junior school as everybody lived locally.
Last week I had some more days off work (I KNOW) I'm totally part time at the moment. I'm being brave because there's loads of work building up that I can't get to, but I'm always too busy at work and so it's not a case of bad timing - there is no good timing basically.
I'm bouncing around whether I should leave work. How I feel about it depends on the moment. The pay is terrible and the stress levels are ridiculous, but I love the people and the job is making an important difference to the world. However, my bank balance is telling me to go very loudly. I just don't know what to do.
Last week we went to see a very dear friend who lives near Cambridge. She's one of my son's godmothers. A true eccentric it's always a joy to see her. However, she's not great at life decisions and the past 15 years have left her in something of an economic crisis. It hurts so badly to see her with such a financial struggle, but she will not accept any help.
We had a lovely time with her, had a great chinwag, caught up on life and then went out for a meal. We haven't seen her for ages - she's basically working every weekend trying to keep her house. I met her at work and I can tell you one thing - she is extremely talented and a real grafter. So when she tells you she is massively busy that means that she is working so hard anybody else would just fall to the floor.
As her house is full of the bits and bobs she needs for her work we stayed in the pub next door. A great stay actually the room was amazing and we even had a separate little bedroom for son. Breakfast the next day was one of the best I've ever had. Watch out Luton Hoo - your crown might just be taken by a pub.
We didn't see huge amounts of friend because a week before we meet up she got in touch to say she'd been booked for a 2 day stint when we were staying. As she'd be free from 3.00pm on day one (and we'd be driving to her anyway) and then leaving at 10.00 the next day we decided to keep the visit as planned.
After she had left we decided to go to Duxford (Imperial War Museum) that is about 5 miles from her house. The boys went in and I stayed outside with the dog. I'd have been really interested to go, but my attention span is about 40 minutes so it made sense that they both went and I imagined what was inside.
There's a lot of family history with Duxford as they used to have some of the aircraft my dad few in there. Dad flew lots of different types of things, but his speciality was autogyros. There's a book that talks about dad - when he was playing chicken with one of his friends. Seeing how high they could fly the autogyros before the propellers froze. Dad got really high and a passenger jet went by. The pilot reported back to ground '!!**)" Hell, there's a goblin on a motorbike up here - and he's waving at me'.
Aaaaanyway, whilst the boys were inside I wandered around staring through the fence and taking pictures of the bits and bobs I could see. The photo above was a bit of a cheat - essentially I shoved my camera through a fence. In reality I didn't get a good look as there was a fence between me and the hangar.
Though a couple of Spitfires took off and did a bit of an air show. I absolutely love a Spitfire. I'm not sure I'd like to go up in one, but I love to watch them.
After Duxford we came back home.
Friday was spent choring about Italy - I managed to get hold of the hotel and we've booked transfers and stuff, but I remain very nervous about it. There's still a while to go and I cling to the hope that the airline cancel it, though that seems to be happening less. However, knowing that I've done all I can now to make it a success is making me feel slightly less stressed out. Slightly not completely. There's plenty more time for me to fuss about though so hopefully by the time we go I can put my zen head on and cope with it.
It's funny to think that I used to be terrified of flying - whenever I went anywhere I'd worry for months beforehand, but only about being on the aircraft. Now I'm completely chilled about flying - it's everything else that sends me into a flap. I think the main thing is that you used to be sent nice bits of paper explaining what to happen and with everything you need.
Now there is an expectation that you'll just know how to use all the apps and work out how to get to the holiday yourself. It makes me feel very old as it just sends me into a white panic.
I think it may be a good few years before I consider going overseas again. That sounds pathetic doesn't it. But the stress is just way too much for me. Perhaps the first signs of me getting old and the new world going to fast for me.
God I feel old!
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