HideyHo!

My life has always been chaotic - that's why I wanted to start a blog to record the highs and lows. Not really to share as such, but more of a personal diary of what makes me so wrinkled and also what makes me laugh at life (or I'd cry).

I went through a long spell when I first started this blog, where my life wasn't really living up to it's normal level of chaos. This was because we were in lockdown with COVID and I was on furlough - with pretty much myself and my radio to keep company as husband worked from home and son home schooled.

Even as I wrote the blog back in those days I was aware how dull another blog about hanging out washing was - but I knew that if I didn't start the blog then and commit to it - I'd never get around to it, because once the chaos started again it would go back to my to do list.

But now it seems that my chaotic life has gone back to full throttle.

I thought I'd share my utterly delightful morning.

Woke up at 4.30am because I heard dog ratting about. Dog sleeps in a crate in our hall, but we leave the door open. We can't keep her in kitchen because it's so tiny - if the crate was in there, there'd be no room for a human!

So I went downstairs and turned the light on. Only to see that dog had done a poo in the middle of the dining room (darn our open plan house) - there's literally nowhere the dog can be shut away except for the bedrooms or the sun room. The sun room is blazing hot in the summer and sub zero in the winter - so that would just be cruel.

So I got a poo bag, picked up the mess - put it outside and then got on my hands and knees to clean the carpet (all before 05.00am).

Then later son got up - he locked himself away in the loo. When I got ready for work I went into the bathroom and there, still in the loo - was a poo the size of a babies arm. So I duly flushed - it was going nowhere. I brushed my teeth and let the cistern refill - I flushed again. The poo went around the u-bend and then came back to the main pan again - it was so huge and rigid - it couldn't make it around the bend.

There was only one thing to do - once again I went and got one of the dog's poo bags - I had to fish the worlds most enormous poo out of the loo - bag it up. Once I had this bag of poo I was stuck what to do with it. So I put it outside in the bin we keep the dog poo in.

I went downstairs and told husband and son about my experience. They were horrified by what I'd had to do, but even more horrified I'd put it outside with the dog poo. 'What did you expect me to do I said'. 

Son said 'Well cut it up so it flushes'

Husband said 'You should have pushed it up and around the u-bend'

Honestly the only response to that was the one I gave...

'Well if you both think those are such great ideas, next time it happens I'll let one of you try your idea out'.

That shut them both up very quickly.

I literally can't believe some of the things I end up doing - is this normal - does everybody else end up doing this too - but they just don't own up to it?????